I'm so sorry. I can't help this feeling. CRAP. jealousy is a very bad thing and I have lots of it. I don't know to deal with this anymore. I never felt crazy jealous like this before. WHAT HAS BECOME OF ME, so uncool. GET A FUCKING GRIP. Sorry, I really am. I'm so uncool. She's so cool. THIS IS SO UNCOOL. Chill.
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Had time alone today, walked from Cathay to Orchard to Cathay to Liang Court to Central to Raffles Place to Fullerton to Esplanade to Marina Square to Raffles City. See how much time I had for myself. Finally, some peace. As soon as I talk to him, I go haywire again. I had so much time thinking what's best, talking, .. crying .. smiling .. being satisfied, then when he talked to me, I go haywire. What? Am I not happy? I am. It's me. There's something terribly wrong with me.
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You know why I don't believe in love?
First it was Tatsuki, said he loves me, ask me to wait for him to come back from Japan, oh we were in love alright. He's really nice. I waited.. for 3years or so. He came back... with another girl. Happy? Second, was my unknown exbf, he said he loves me, though I know I did not love him as much, I didn't cheat. He did. Funny, with my best friend. Why didn't they just tell me they were in love, GRACIOUS. Have to courtesy to tell me, not as if I'll die. Happy?
I'm not a good girl to be with. Love exist, I just don't believe it. I did decide to believe, but I couldn't handle emotions. So I had to let him go. Then one, brought me to a roller coaster ride. I don't really know what's going on here. He rock, shook my world, then he just left. What just happened? I don't know what's he doing either, what is he thinking. Nope.
I don't deserve big love. I do not like relationships. It's too.. difficult and heavy. If I were to really want to love, would he run after me if I decide to go run away? Would he go after me?
meh. lemme alone. LOL
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Brittani brings you, SHOUT OUT SUNDAY!
ZELDA !!
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idk what i'm doing anymore. idk what i'm feeling anymore. i just wanna rot away. to disappear from the surface of the earth. oAo there's too much. one needs to go while the other one stays.
*diabolical!
going against gravity, diabolical, loves to read, eats ice cream without being depressed, doesn't like the day, love sunflowers, mad about strawberries,
loves to lie under water, wants to climb mountains, wants to bungee jump, loves cakes, doesn't smile often, dislike sadness, doesn't sleep. (no, I kid, I'm not diabolical)-
actually, I'm not really a die hard fan of REMILIA SCARLET, she's my SECOND favorite, MY FAVORITE OBVIOUSLY HAZ TO BE HER MAID, IZAYOI SAKUYA, if I have someone as loyal as that,
I will love her forever. Actually I do and I LOVE HER WITH MY WHOLE HEART AND SOUL <3<3
